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Showing posts from August, 2023

Passion, Selfishness & Creating Happiness

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  Passion, Selfishness & Creating Happiness.   Passion and intention involve Focus. Consider: what would happen if you focused on the outcome you want, instead of the scary experience you worry about? As a child,  I was constantly being told I was selfish.  To be honest, I probably was a rather insensitive, bossy child. I'm a big personality.  As I grew up, I learned more self-control and a little empathy, at least enough for civilized society. What lingered with me, however, was   the accusation of being “selfish.” As that childhood feeling blossomed and matured into a belief and ultimately a reality, I became more and more unhappy and afraid to express my needs.  Being called selfish was my greatest shame.  It is for many of us. Then I grew up.  I learned that having been taught that it was rude and selfish to keep trying to get what I want was only part of the story. Very  happy and successful people  never lose their ability to  know what they want and go after it.   My men

How do you handle difficult people? Advice from a dog owner...

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  How do you handle difficult people?   Meet Max, our 6-month-old ‘adolescent” puppy. He’s a good boy, but only if he knows that he has boundaries. Leave him alone in the room, and he will take apart the laundry hamper, jump onto the couch, and wreak general havoc. Did I mention he’s teething as well? He loves to chew! You see, he’s not quite mature enough to make consistently good choices and needs a solid boundary while he grows up. Enter a well-trained dog owner- and a crate. Max feels terrible when he breaks his boundary, and the crate is actually his friend while he develops decision-making skills and self-control. He is safe within the boundary of his crate and rests well there. You may wonder how Max relates to the idea of difficult people in our lives. Consider advice from the Dog Whisperer, Cesar Millan. A dog seeks a pack leader above all else. If you are not the leader, he will be. He wants order. Difficult people can be very much like my puppy. They want to be good, but the

Creator-based® Learning

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  Lessons learned that you can have for free.   This past week I had the opportunity to experience illness. You know- fever, body aches, chills & exhaustion- the works. The Big Daddy. It’s been almost ten years, but each time this happens, I have a new learning chance, and this experience was no different. These are the thoughts that came out of that experience. Consider them for free- you don’t even have to be sick yourself to learn them! Adversity, in this case, illness, shuts down our current life pattern. When you can’t get up to follow your daily routine, you have no choice. It disables autopilot and automatic thoughts. It breaks patterns. It opens a new way of thinking and responding to our world. Change disables automatic thoughts.  They don’t have anywhere to run because their endpoint is no longer there. It breaks patterns, and if we allow it, it opens the way to growth.   Research has shown that infants and young children often have a significant cognitive or motor skill

Creator-based® Change- it's Coming Again!

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  The Winds of Change are Coming...   It’s August! And  the winds of change have begun to blow.  It’s back-to-school season, and whether you have kids in school or were once a school kid, we all feel it. Change is coming; football season and the holidays are right around the corner. How does that feel to you? Are you excited? Do you dread it?  A combination of both? We all have opinions about change, but try this thought on: ‘Change is a gift.’ If we didn’t have the gift of change, a toothache would go on forever, we would never add more money to our checking account, and we wouldn’t love the precious moments we spend with our loved ones quite as much because there would be  no time to miss them and feel that bittersweet contrast.  Change is good, friend. How, then, do we passionately embrace change?   How do we get excited about even the unwelcome changes? Here are a couple of ideas for you to ponder this week- Appreciate that all things are temporary and soak up the exquisite good in